About Andrew Phelps
Andrew Phelps is a WBUR reporter and the host of Hubbub, a new blog about Boston.
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Remembering Dad
The mass response to my Web site is stunning. After writing about Dad’s love of flowers yesterday, I came home from an appointment today to find my doorstep covered in flowers. It was a sight to behold.
Also, the Harold R. Phelps Memorial Fund I introduced yesterday has already generated a lot of donations. I will be excited to share the dollar amounts in the coming days.
Arrangements are confirmed. My father’s funeral is at the Mission San Luis Rey in Oceanside, CA (map) on Saturday, September 18 at 1 p.m. I will be speaking at the service.
You and your family are welcome to come. The congregation will be very large, and we do not want any person to feel unsure about coming. Even if you did not know my father at all, your presence will be meaningful.
The service is a traditional Catholic ceremony with Mass. Dress however you feel is appropriate.
A viewing is also scheduled for the day before the funeral, on Friday, September 17. It lasts 4-8 p.m. at the Alhiser-Comer Mortuary on 225 S. Broadway, Escondido, CA (map).
If you have any questions, call me: +1 (760) 598-3340. Please make this weekend one to remember my dad.
7 Comments on ‘Remembering Dad’
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Andrew – I’m David’s XC Team Mom… Not only is your weblog absolutely awesome but here you are HELPING ALL OF US out here by keeping us informed about details (with maps included) when WE’D like to HELP YOU! Please email me and let me know if there’s any way in which myself or other families on the team can help out because people are asking me what they can do. What are available dates to have meals delivered to your home? And, know that you, David, your Mom and your grandparents are in our thoughts
Dear Andrew,
Allie called me at 1:30 a.m. last night in tears with the news of your dad’s death. I spent the next few hours up praying for your father and your family. An unexpected death is so numbing. Somehow God gives you the strength to make it through the immediate realization so that you can help others in their sorrow while expressing your own. Along the way, I’ve found,in the immediate days following the death of a loved one,He also blesses you with moments that let you feel their pressence, their peace. I pray that you are able to experience this peace. Our minds can complicate death, while our hearts can touch our loved ones through eternity.
I pray that you are able to feel your father in your daily life guiding you in all you do and that you are able to see and remember him in all that he touched in this life. Let your eyes and your heart be open. He will continue to be there for you now and for eternity.
Our love goes out to you, Andrew.
Please let us know how we can help you and your family, Andrew.
Susan Orton and family
Andrew, I’m so very sorry to hear of your father’s death. May his gentle memories comfort you in the coming days. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
I will miss your dad very much. I thought of him as a true renaissance man. Rich had a way about him that let you feel at ease. Hard working, energetic, intelligent, sensitive, persevering, generous, and a good person to call a friend. He was a unique individual and one that I will always look back on fondly. We all know that your Dad was a great man and if his life would have continued we all would have benefited from his wisdom, kindness, humor, and gentle manor.
I will be sad and miss him…
George
Andrew -
Please accept deepest condolences from my family to your family on the death of your father and our friend.
I am glad I had the opportunity to know your father. I always enjoyed our conversations and his observations of the world. You are like your Dad in this manner. I have personally always enjoyed talking with you, and it has been a pleasure to watch you grow into a fine young man of intelligence, depth and style. I know that your Dad must have been incredibly proud of you Andrew, and, if he could see you today, he’d only be that much prouder.
One of my favorite poems reminds me of your Dad as it is about someone who was taken before their time. One verse, my favorite verse, roughly goes:
“Now he will not swell the route
Of men who wore their honor out
Runners who renown outran
And the name died before the man”…..
Your Dad’s name has not died and the essence of Rich is carried within you and your brother and will always be there.
Your Dad certainly had miles to go before he slept, and it is sad that he did not get to finish the long run. One job that I know he would have loved to finish was one that was based on love- raising two fine sons. Though he didn’t get to finish this task, he did etch a deep blueprint of his values and knowledge in you, and the man that you and your brother become will in many material ways be based on your interactions with your Dad as he taught you about being a man, being a complete person.
The hardest part will be to not have him around as you go through life’s various events. But he will be there Andrew. Sometimes, when you have to make a big decision I’m sure you will take a second and wonder “what would my Dad do” and then act accordingly. He will be there in those decisions. Othertimes, you will make a decision based on instinct – a gut feeling – and later, in retrospect, you’ll sit back and say “thanks, Dad” as you know that your Dad’s nurturing of you, his love for you was the root source of your instinct. He will be there at those times as well.
And one of the ways you will make him most proud in the future is to let his life – and not his death – most impact your life. This doesn’t mean don’t grieve – as you need to grieve as you have suffered a terrible loss. It means not to let your Dad’s death define your future or change your essence. It instead means letting his life’s essence assist you on your life’s path, assist you in reaching your dreams. I know that it will be very hard not to let your Dad’s death define your future, but you are a very capable individual. He and your Mom raised you well.
Again, we are very sorry for your loss, and have nothing but continued best wishes for you, your brother and your Mom.
-Steve, Beverly, Morgen, Nick and Greg Halsey
Andrew: Todd and I are devastated. We were so so thrilled to reconnect with your Mom and Dad this past July after having not seen them since our 20th college reunion. You probably know that we introduced your Mom and Dad – your Mom is my dear friend from childhood days in Saddle River, NJ and Rich was one of Todd’s housemates at Lynchburg. We share so many wonderful, hilarious and precious memories and when we visited in July it was as if no time had passed – that’s the way it always was. We just laughed and laughed like old times, looking forward to getting together again in October for the Lynchburg College 25th reunion. There are just no words to describe the hole we feel in our hearts…in July your dad looked as tan and fit and healthy as he always did – as tan as he looked in ’78 on the beach in his cowboy hat…ask Todd to tell you some of those stories sometime and look at the photos – Todd and Rich and Brad share some crazy memories for sure…maybe some we’d better not share with you! Your Dad was a charmer, he loved to laugh – at life and at himself…we would always tease him about his “gift” for telling stories and then kind of veering off on a wierd tangent that made NO sense…well, you know…your mom will no doubt remember the line “one was black, actually…” One time back in college your Dad was telling a story about some goldfish and then felt compelled to add “well, one was black, actually…” That was pure Rich and completely cracked us up – I think that line was still brought up this past July. Your Dad would always laugh at that. We had a blast in college and our biggest regret was that your family lived so darn far away from us. We loved him so, so much and will miss him every day. We adore your Mom and will always be there for her. All our love, Sandi and Todd Parker
Andrew, I'm so very sorry to hear of your father's death. May his gentle memories comfort you in the coming days. You are in my thoughts and prayers.